And The Search Continues….

Today on my way to office, my bus stopped at a signal. I was sitting at the window seat and noticed a guy on bike with a pretty girl sitting at the back. It seemed that they were a couple. The girl was talking something to the guy and the guy was multi-tasking, I mean not just listening to her (or at least pretending to do so) was also gazing at every other girl at the signal. Poor girl I thought. But then it is not something just with her. Every time I am on the roads this is something I get to notice quite often. Today its him ‘maaro a chance’ on someone else’s girlfriend, tomorrow it would be someone else trying his luck at his girlfriend. And the network continues….

Well we all have our share of such kind of jerks in our lives. Or in other words, all men are the same. What was he searching for? I thought. A pretty girl by his side, still he is not happy with that and seeks for more pleasure. Guys have a typical thing in common i.e. to look at others plate all the time, even if they have their own full. What I fail to understand is what results them behave this certain way? I have heard many of my friends who after having ditched by their boyfriends, often say that men are dogs. I don’t really agree with them here. After all dogs are much loyal, aren’t they? Have you ever heard of any dog who ditched his owner?

The big question that I often ask my male friends is what makes then behave this way? Why aren’t you guys happy with one girl at a time? Why more numbers of girlfriends in your list means the more hot property you are? And why is it that when it comes to choosing the their girl, variety becomes the spice of life? The more naive (or at least pretend to be so) that you are, guys like you the more. In every era, the RAVAN goes for a ‘Sati-savitri’ SITA all the time. Now that’s not fair!!

‘I’ for “Indian”…!

Once again this question was put up against me. A question that leaves me confused. Every time someone asks me about my aborigine I go blank for a second and then reply that I am from West Bengal. But somewhere in my subconscious mind it leaves me unsatisfied with my answer and I ask myself “Do I really belong to West Bengal?”. To be honest I myself don’t know where I belong to. I am searching for an answer to this question myself.

I was born in a town in East Midnapur of West Bengal. Now if that makes me a Bengali then I am certainly one. But my stay in West Bengal has never been for more than a month at a stretch. I was barely a month old when my mom n dad brought me to Nashik (Maharashtra). I was too young to carry any memories of that place with me. The only vague memories that I have of a place would be Bangalore, where dad was posted after Nashik. A place where I started my schooling from and made three amazing friends. Though all I can remember is their names (‘Kaushal’, ‘Hari’ and ‘Divya Lakshmi’). I will not be able to recognize them now even if they come in front. All I remember is that we four were very good friends and shared the same bench in class!! That was in my first standard. But my friendship with them lasted only for around six months and dad got transferred to Tezpur (Assam). Don’t have much memories of this place with me, except for few funny incidents (it became funny once the tremor was over) of me witnessing earthquakes, as that tenure was very a short one, of around six months. Yes one person I remember from my class would be ‘Neha’, a big bully, I didn’t like her at all. And when I think of her now it brings a smile on my face! After Tezpur I went back to the place where I claim I belong to. That was the time dad got posted to Bagdogra (a place near Darjeeling in West Bengal), where i made lots of friends just to bid them goodbye after 4 years of great friendship and headed up north.

It was the month of December I remember very clear. On the eve of Christmas we reached the place. Biting cold it was but I just loved the weather!!! Pathankot (Punjab) is a place I will cherish always…perhaps because some of my beautiful memories are associated to this place, which I would love to visit once more in my life. I just love each and everything about the place…be it its cold weather…the people…the food…and above all my school...My teachers…and ‘Sumeet’…I got the best of it all over there. The best school of my life, the best teachers who pampered me a lot…and my best friend ‘Sumeet’, though even after lot of efforts I went out of touch with her. That is the sad part of being a defense kid. You get to go different places, meet different people, make friends and then one day you leave them all behind and move to another place and the process continues!


And this time my journey came for a halt into the heart of India, Madhya Pradesh. Gwalior…hmmm…another place I love to the core. The thing that I like the most about MP is the down to earth and humble nature of its people. After all it is not the place, it is the people around that makes a place special, isn’t it? Well, I had many of my ‘firsts’ in life here…my first (and last) crush…my first experience of college life…and all the fun coupled with it…and yes this place gave me two of my best buddies, ‘Priya’ and ‘Usha’. This was my second time association with Priya as we had studied together in the same class in Bagdogra as well and meeting her again was like a lost brother found, and this time the bonding became stronger than ever. We three did all the crazy stuff together…bunking classes and spending hours at coffee shops…roaming jobless in the market…eating ‘pani-puris’ and ‘chats’ on roadsides shops…watching movies..teasing guys(in a decent way of course)…well those were truly the best days of my life…!! But all good things had to come to an end one day and this too had an end and I had to come to Chennai.

Delhi was the place I always wanted to go for pursuing my higher studies and the news of my family shifting to Chennai came as not so pleasant news. So after a lot of ‘rona and dhona’ I finally landed up in Chennai and it was a kind of cultural shock for me at first. I had heard enough of non sense about Chennai from my friends who had been here before but i only realized the ground reality once I stepped into this land. It was as if I was in a totally different country. The people here could not understand my ‘Hindi’ and I cannot understand a single word of ‘Tamil’…though it is a metro it didn’t look like one to me…I found my Gwalior which is a B-class city better than this place. It took me two years to get myself adjusted to this part of the world.

My first sense of belongingness towards Chennai happened when I went to Delhi for an internship. There for everyone I was ‘FROM CHENNAI’ and every time there was a discussion over the north and south divide, I unconsciously ended up supporting south and felt so proud to be “FROM CHENNAI”!!! And once am back my entire perception about this place was a changed one. Now I was very much a ‘Chennaite’ and this was ‘MY CITY’. Also it brought me more close to my friends and classmates with whom I had kept a distance for no reasons. But then do I really belong to Chennai?? Because I know one day I have to say good bye to this place as well and head towards a new destination.

So where do I truly belong to? If your place of birth is your identity then I am from West Bengal. But I don’t think I possess any other qualities from that place. After having spent 24 years of my life like a nomad and have been to almost every part of India and met people from all the states, I feel I am nothing but an Indian. I am an Indian in every aspect, be it the colour of my skin or my thoughts or my accent…it all reflects the ‘Indian-ness’ in me…and hence I am an ‘INDIAN’…and to be more specific a ‘Human Being’! Hopefully a good one…!!! :)

"I am sorry"

‘Sorry’, perhaps is the most common word that we all use every now and then. We step on someone’s feet, we say sorry. We sneeze, we say sorry. We drop something we say sorry. We break something, we say sorry. But when we break someone’s heart, we don’t. Why so? Have you ever thought about it? Why it becomes so difficult to repeat the same word one more time. This amazing word, an answer to all our mistakes, that keep coming to us very easily otherwise. Why does it become so difficult to say it when you are needed to say it the most? I have seen people around me who believe that apologizing means lowering their pride and prestige. And yes I must admit that I am no different or somewhere we all are the same. Of course a little more or less than the other! I have even seen people apologizing on their social networking profiles as their status message. Now, that is bizarre!!!


I wonder what is it that keeps them away from apologizing in person? They say that one should never apologize until you feel it from inside and never forgive unless that forgivingness comes from within. But even after realizing our mistakes how many of us really go back and apologize to the person whom we have hurt. Why don’t people realize that all it takes is, to accept that you are wrong and leave the rest to the other person? Also here the other person should try to understand that keeping the grudges is going to make them guilty as well. Either don’t hurt others and if you can’t do that, have the guts to accept your fault and apologize to it!


What is that reason that keeps us away from apologizing? Is it the fear of our apologies not being accepted or is it that huge ego of ours that stops us from accepting our mistakes? Just give it a try, you will find it much easy than you thought it is. Half of your mistakes get corrected with the feeling of guilt itself and the rest half when you apologize for the same.


Try it. All you have to do is say these three words: ‘I Am Sorry’. It is not that difficult. Isn’t it? :)

Just Do It!

Life always gives us choice…every problem comes with its own options for us to choose from. Some go the realistic way and approach it rationally, while others (Read: me) follow the way directed by the heart. And yes there are times when we are flooded with options that only adds up to the confusion. So the fewer the options the better it is. In fact having no option is the best option because that way you never make any mistakes. You have one way and one only method to approach. But if you ask me I would say the best approach would be to follow the heart, which is the check post for all the feelings and emotions to pass through. So you better do not let it down. Yet the so called sensible ones prefer the “brainy way” and put a barrier against letting the emotions to come out.

What is the thing that stops us from following our heart instead of mind? Why can’t we express ourselves and reveal our real selves in front of others most of the time? What stops us from expressing it to that someone special of how much you love him/her? Why we take people for granted? Why we take relationships for granted? Why we do not say ‘Thank you’ to our mom for the everyday cooking and cleaning she does for us? Why do we forget to say ‘I love you’ to those around us and for making our life so special? Are these emotions not so important to be expressed or is it the taken for granted attitude of ours that stops us from doing so? Yes few things go without saying but what is wrong in expressing yourself just one more time and every time? All it takes is a thought and then express it to all those who mean a lot to you and you to them. Do it, after all the smile on their faces that you will get in return is worth it! Yes we do know it is worth it, still most of us don’t do that. Not because we don’t get time to do so or don't feel to express. The reason behind is just that we are so used of taking things for granted! And forget that it is our verbal power of communication that differentiates us from the animals and makes us human. Yet we seldom realize the importance and prefer to remain mum most of the time.


So what stops you, me and most of us from expressing ourselves right at the moment and follow our heart? Well it is a strange force that I realized few days ago, while travelling in a local train. I so much wanted to get up and offer my seat to that old man who was standing in the crowd. But a strange force stopped me from doing so. I don’t know what made me feel hesitant. Was that my selfish inner self that stopped me or the thought of people around? No it is not that I didn’t want to help him, I certainly did but didn’t have the guts to stand up and offer him my seat before the other guy offered him his own. Something stopped me from following my heart and expressing me at that particular moment. So meanwhile I took my decision making time this fellow next to me gets up and offeres his seat. He followed his heart and i could not. It was just a matter of seconds but all I did was wasted time. While he just followed what came to his heart right there and right then. So now he was one happy soul and I captured by the sin. But yes, this incident did make me realise of the force that keeps people engaged in doing everything but following their heart and expressing themselves.

Be it verbal or non-verbal…all I would say is do not hold the feeling back just express it as it comes. Forget the if’s and the but’s. Just put across what your heart wants to say and make the use of article 19 to the fullest!!!
Smile at the child whom you see every day at the tea stall while passing through the pavement or at the stranger whom you meet every day in the local train while going for work. Next time when you are free call that best friend of yours who stood by you thick and thin and thank him/her without a reason, say ‘I love you’ and show your care to all those who are near and dear to you…Life is short, so make the most of it NOW...Kya pata KAL HO NA HO! :)

Happy V'day!

Ok so its Valentine’s Day today and this year too i am celebrating it all alone. No I am not here to sob about my single status but I wonder what makes people celebrate this day with so much of buzz? You don’t need just one specific day to show your love to your lover… Do you? And what if you can’t do it this day? Would you wait for the next 14th Feb. to arrive for doing so? Sounds stupid isn’t it? With the pace with which people make and break relations or the so called ‘relations’ by the time the next 14th Feb. arrives they would be having 14 new entries in the list of sweethearts! A bitter reality about the relationships these days.
Yes I know what is going in your mind right now. Ok let me stop looking at the cons and bring some light into the positivity of it. Yes looking at the amount of hatred and indifference surrounding us these days. A day to remind us of the joy of spreading love is not such a bad idea. After all celebrations are what life should be all about and if it is celebrating love then that’s a reason good enough. Then why restrict it just with couples? Spread the love with everyone around…each and every person who is near and means a lot to you. To all those who are far yet close to your heart. And also to those who are not so close to your heart. Celebrate this day of love today and to the rest of the days of the year as well. Wishing you all a very Happy Valentine’s Day! :)

Home **Sweet** Home :)

Happy New Year guys!!! Yes the few handfuls who take toll and visit ‘My World’. Finally I am back from Kolkata after a not very long but eventful tour. Coming to Chennai was never so joyful. In fact I never thought that I would ever be so happy to step back into the city. Especially after a long train journey that sap in all your energy when you finally reach your station..its a bliss! One word that would define a train journey would be boring, boring and only boring. Gone are the days when I used to enjoy it so much as a kid that I never wanted it to end. Now it sucks!!! The never ending track just keeps becoming lengthier and lengthier.
Well in a zest this trip to Kolkata was full of fun n exhaustion. Now I really want break from holidays and travelling! Yes you heard it right…BREAK FROM HOLIDAYS!!! Just can’t stand the stays in hotels and relatives places….maasi, naani, daadi, taau’s home and all…really nothing can beat the coziness and friendliness of the place that gives you the greatest comfort of the entire world. The place that you call your ‘HOME’. Finally I m back in mine and my bed is calling me…need a power nap…catch u later…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Scale Scare

Today I did quite a daring act…no I didn’t jump from the clock tower or killed a cockroach. Not as daring as these, but certainly quite a daring one at least to me. After keeping myself away from my weight machine for quite a long I finally gathered some courage to do a reality check on how much I have put on in the last couple of months after I stopped working out.
So everyone is right that I have put on weight and today even the scales proved so. Well the results were not very shocking to me as it was something I was very much anticipating after indulging into food (all unhealthy ones) so much all these days. After all, I spent most o the time in either a restaurant or coffee shop in past few months. Why? Well I myself don’t know. Perhaps just wanted to break the monotony of eating the same boring ‘healthy’ food. By the way a foodie doesn’t need any excuse to indulge into food! When you see those eyes giving you strange looks as you try getting an extra scoop of ice cream at the dinner table… when the waiter at the restaurant welcomes you with a big friendly smile as you become a regular customer …when that favorite dress of yours that you bought couple of months back becomes tight like your old rags… when you don’t fit into that dressing table mirror anymore… all these doesn’t mean that you have added inches around your waist but just remind you that the past few months have been quite a solace for the foodie inside you.
What I fail to understand is that why everyone around keeps reminding you that you have put on weight as if you don’t know that? :P Yes I know that I have put on before anyone else realises, still everyone brings this reality to the surface that I just don’t wanna face! I wonder why is it the others that are more worried about MY weight that ME? Guys why don’t you please mind our own business (Read: Tummy)?
May be we all are a bit more judgmental when it comes to others. Or may be because they really care for ME. Well whatever, the bottom line is I have put on weight and need to shed it down. Time to hit the treadmill…..again!

Kick-Ass!!!

Today I am going to talk about a particular type of creature whom I am sure we all have got the chance to see in our lives at some point or the other. You will find them every where and at every stage of life. At home, at office, school, college, almost every where, even in the mythology you will get to see the proof of their existence, having a lot of credit on their lap for being the catalyst of many of the great wars in the history. We grew up among them, always surrounding us and annoying us. You will find them everywhere among friends, siblings, classmates and yes last but the most important habitat of these creatures…office. Some love to keep them, some love to become one and the rest (read: me) who don’t fit into the earlier two just watch helplessly cribbing about them. So helplessly venting my frustration here. Take a look around and you will find them all around. These are the people carrying the secret recipe of being successful without actually working. I have seen quite a many and I am sure you too have had to deal with your share of such jerks. One is enough to change your life into a hell. You do everything…work sincerely towards your goals…try to achieve all your targets on time…do almost everything to get what these get doing only one thing i.e. nothing! If you wonder why am I talking of them?? Well just happened to see one such creature sitting in front of me and don’t have any other place to express my frustration, so am here.

If you still wonder that whom I am talking about then let me tell you. The dictionary define these creatures as ‘a person who flatters someone important in a servile way’ and others like me call them…well there are quite a few of them….Sycophant, asskisser, butterer, parasite, suck up, crawler, toady, yesman, but my fav is the desi version ‘chamchagiri’. Sucks!!!

'Happy Diwali'

Life is so unpredictable. Full of surprises and sorrows. A mystery that we keep solving throughout this journey and still don’t get an answer to it. A simple question that leaves us all puzzled. What is life? A fascinating journey that teaches us lessons at every step, a journey that we start alone and as we move ahead people keep joining in. Some momentarily, some for a little more than that. Few we forget easily, few we cannot and there are few whom we want to forget but cannot. The unpredictability about life is perhaps the most fascinating thing about it. You never know what will happen the next moment. You never know you will have the same people around you the very next moment. Yet it is this optimistic human nature that lets us go to sleep with the hope of waking up the next day to witness a bright sunshine. We meet people, some touch our heart, and some leave without any impact. I never thought that it was my last meeting with him and I will never be able to see him again when he came to see us off a year back when we were leaving Delhi. I still remember his ever smiling face and humorous nature that helps him strikes a rapport immediately with anyone he met. He was a distant relative of mine whom even I was not aware of until I inquired among my close ones to find someone to help me find an accommodation for my internship in Delhi. That was the time when me and my family met him for the first time.

A day before yesterday while browsing though my phone book to send ‘Diwali Messages’ (the forwarded ones) suddenly his number popped up on the screen. After returning from Delhi, not even a single festival went without wishing him. And this Diwali, he is no more there between us. Or may be he is still alive in our memories, and will always be alive in our hearts. Wish you ‘A Very Happy Diwali’ Uncle!

Sach Ka Samna

‘Ghandhi Jayanti’ just passed by and the first thing that comes to my mind when you say ‘BAPU’ after his trademark round glasses, is his autobiography ‘My Experiments with Truth’. “Truth and honesty have always been an integral part of ‘Bapu’s’ life and we should also try to imbibe the very same in ours”, that’s what has always been told to us since childhood. But the truth about ‘Truth’ is that it is bit not so practical to stick to telling ‘Truth’ all the time in today’s world. In other words, it is hard to survive without lying in the present scenario. At least without the small ones, which we use every now and then without even realizing that we are lying.

Why am I saying this is that recently I have broken all my previous records on lying and lied quite a lot this week. And no I am not here for apologies. Sometimes a little lying is necessary for your own survival in this not so honest world. I mean you have to become sick when your boss doesn’t grant you leave and you have exhausted all your casual leaves and you definitely don’t wanna miss that outing with your friends. Especially for a journo like me where week doesn't end on weekends. :( So what if your Boss too knows that all your excuses are so ‘not true’! I know most of us do that (except for those of us who are from Mars and clame having never lied in their lives!!! Duh?).

Now giving a make over to my image that I ruined in the above few lines let me tell you, I am not a typical liar who uses this art all the time. On the contrary I have always tried to refrain from lying. The reason could be that I have always been bad at lying. And so ventured towards honesty and always abstain from lying of course except for a few instances where it just came out on its own as a self defense. Thought every lier gives this excuse of 'self defense'. But yes honestly is the best policy and I totally imbibing that. Why do people lie? What makes them lie? The truth about lying is that, we all indulge into it. Some a little less, others a little more. The bottom line is as long as it doesn’t harm anyone’s sentiments, indulging into a bit of lying is not that bad. What do you think?